Me caught in my drinky mood which is usually Halloween
(note: I really have a weird relationship with alcohol where I either love or hate everything about it depending on my mood or the people I’m around (I can go from being a Straight Edge douche to Barney Gumble...although never as drunk as Barney). My life with alcohol is kinda like the relationship of my parents where one minute they’ll be fighting, then suddenly fucking, and then fighting again”. This rant just finds me in my “straight edge” mood. Nothing is really forever and the only real guarantee anyone can ever make is to die one day, so whatever, moods come and go and life always changes, isn’t that what makes it worth living? Can’t be doing and thinking the same exact shit for every second of your life…Coffee on the other hand, I’ve been pretty consistent over hating that shit)
I just don't get it. Alcohol tastes like gasoline mixed with piss, fucks up your body, and makes you act like a fucking retard, yet people always glorify it. It's the "life of a party". Well, parties usually suck. If your mouth isn't a bull's anus and you hate shitty pop/rap/r&b music, then there's really nothing much left to do at parties. Just stand around and try to look important while holding a drink. Hmm, I guess that's why you gotta drink to "enjoy" a party. You have to make yourself so drunk that you can't even realize how much parties suck ass. I also guess that's why I'm only a "social" drinker as I only drink whenever I'm around people just to numb myself to the fact that their lame existence coincides with mines.
I miss being a kid cause parties used to be cool. Parties were all about pizza, cake, ice cream, lazer tag, and beating up midget clowns trying to provide for their kids by getting their asses kicked by somebody else's kids. When you get older most parties you get invited to are so boring, it's all about over-priced drinks in a club and bullshitting with bullshit people for the sake of social status and networking with a bunch of phonies or to just get laid by some snotty whore that tries to look too cool to talk to anyone until she's filled up with liquor and drops the panties for whatever drunk idiot guy has the best careers and vomits the least on her expensive dress.
I used to be antisocial cause I had no choice; I was an obese shy little video game addicted loser throughout my childhood and early teens. Now that I'm none of those things and gave "socializing" a lot of chances (yeah I've given it chances to be fair), I still am antisocial, probably even more antisocial than ever! I'm the type of guy that only goes to parties if there's going to be food and goes to shows just for the music and to mosh (it's the closest thing I get to beating someone's ass legally). I'm a simple man, after a day of crappy work I just want to eat, sleep, shit, jerkoff, and work on some noise compositions or crayon doodles when I'm not busy watching sitcom re-runs while lifting weights to relieve stress from being subjected to the stupid commercials.
I hate those people that just stand around at shows drinking and talking to some dumb fashion whore slut, while ignoring the music all together. I've been to shows where the stupid drunks were louder than the actual band and you couldn't even hear the music cause the stupid drunks just kept yakking about something not worth caring about. Sure the bands drink too sometimes, but whatever, as long as they can deliver the music is all I care about. I've seen some bands before that were so drunk that they couldn't even play their shit right. Am I the only one that still thinks shows and concerts should be about the music, not the fucking alcohol? You can get alcohol whenever all year long. Getting live music from a decent band at your local club is not something that happens often so quit fucking up my experience by getting drunk and not being able to shut the hell up when the music starts.
Coffee is another drink I can't stand. I just hate that taste. Whenever I drink a cup of coffee, it feels like someone took a hot dump in my mouth to make my tongue marinade in some sort of bitter, chalky, fecal fluid. Sometimes there'll be a hot chick that'll say "lets grab a cup of coffee some time". No matter how hot the chick is, I have a knee jerk reaction to say, "oh I don't drink coffee". Yeah, I've blown it a million times but fuck it! If the chick were really meant to be with me, she would have cut the coffee-bullshit and went straight to giving me a nice sloppy blowjob. I think a lot of people don't even really like coffee and just buy it for fashion. I have to clean an entire parking garage as part of my job and every fucking day, no matter what time of the day it is, there are cups of coffee just left sitting in the garage with literally only like 2 or 3 sips taken from it. Emptying trash cans on the street daily is another thing I do and every fucking day the bags are full of coffee. You'd think people would drink every drop of overpriced Starbucks coffee but most people just take a sip and throw the rest of the shit out. Maybe people are so retarded that they forget how coffee tastes like every morning so every morning they have to remind themselves about how much coffee sucks for some reason. That would explain why they buy it every morning only drinking a small taste of it then throwing out the whole thing so that garbage bags overfill with oceans of coffee daily. Some people say they drink coffee to "wake up". Uh, well you sure didn't drink, let alone buy, that damn coffee in your sleep. The whole thing about caffeine giving you a boost or whatever seems like just some bullshit placebo effect. Back in my college days, I used to have a really boring political/pretentious art film class featuring many cinematic equivalents of sleeping pills so I used to drink a bunch of energy drinks (high in caffeine) during these films and I STILL fell asleep. Either caffeine is useless or those movies just plain sucked and could put anyone to sleep. Meh, I wouldn't be surprised if both were true though.
Well anyways, coffee and alcohol seem to be drinks people use to socialize with. I'm like allergic to socializing so my disgust over such beverages is not exactly something that puts me in conflict. Fuck alcohol, fuck coffee, and fuck everybody in general. Fuck everything. In fact, fuck writing this rant! What the hell was I thinking when I wrote this? It's like I assumed people would care about my trivial thoughts that are misanthropic in nature, hence why I had to materialize my thoughts through the alphabet in order for them to be contemplated by something other than my own cognitive activity. What the hell is anyone thinking when they do anything? Did they think they were doing something to benefit society? Why the hell does society need benefiting anyways? Society always has problems. I used to have a car that had problems and I just abandoned it. Abandoning society would be a good idea.
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